I.O.W.A.

Last week, I visited my friend, Dave, in Iowa. I don’t want to bring up bad blood or state rivalries here but while Iowans sing the praises of their fine state, my wife—who grew up in Minnesota—insists that IOWA stands for Idiots Out Wandering Around. Again, I’m not trying to instigate conflict. I don’t want my blog blamed for the future war that erupts between these two mid-western states. All I’m saying is, Iowa, if you’re reading this, the people of Minnesota all think you’re a bunch of morons.

Some of the highlights from my relationship with Dave: We’ve known each other for over 25 years. We were college roommates. We got yelled at quite a bit by upperclassmen. We marched a lot of tours together. I’ve become close with Dave’s family and high school friends in Denver over the years. Dave is the kind of friend you don’t lose touch with as years go by, no matter how much distance there is between you. Dave was the best man at my wedding. When I got cancer, Dave shaved his head and flew out to be with me during my chemo treatments. When I had a 13 hour surgery on my jaw, Dave spent the day keeping Betsy company, even though he was in the middle of medical school. Dave is the guy who will drop everything to help out, no matter how much he might be going through personally. 

May 27, 1998. Who'd have guessed that one of these gentlemen would make positive contributions to society?

So now Dave is a doctor at a hospital in Cedar Rapids. Despite what his patients and colleagues told me (and the many malpractice lawsuits), I think he’s a very good doctor. Did that sound bad? What I mean is, if you happen to be in the St. Luke's emergency room in Cedar Rapids, you could do a lot worse than Dr. Baumgartner. Probably. I mean, you're not over at the Mercy ER, right? His wife, Claire, works in palliative care at the same hospital. She is an excellent doctor and sometimes she’s not embarrassed to be seen with her husband. I told Dave I’m doing some part time work for a company that is trying to improve social determinants of health (like food insecurity and social isolation) in East Tennessee. I visited Dave and Claire to see how they deal with social determinants at their hospital. 

I know my current job—Truck2Table and Synergasia Health Tech—doesn’t directly affect the tube feeding community, but I think it’s closely related. I have a strong belief that all tubies deserve to have real food, not canned formula. In the same way, I think people in poverty or those who live in food deserts deserve healthy food, not fast food meals or whatever they find at the Dollar store. These are not dynamic ideas and they could save our medical system billions of dollars in health costs. People across the country are recognizing this, even the idiots—I mean the fine people—of Iowa.

Speaking of healthy food, check out the massive cookie the Big Grove Brewery in Iowa City gave Betsy for free!

It's always nice when we travel somewhere to stay at a friend's house, rather than a hotel room. So much easier use their kitchen and clean the blender after meals, as opposed to blending my meal in a cramped hotel room. Plus, we didn't destroy their house too much, so I think they won't mind if we visit again.

It was also nice to have help when we opened the suitcase that I carry my Vitamixer and Real Food Blend meals in and discovered that one of my RFB bags had popped and spilled all over the inside of the bag. This has never happened before in all the years I've traveled so of course it was a salmon meal that spilled everywhere. Betsy was ready to give up and go out to buy a new bag, but Dave got it all cleaned out for us.

We've lost some hair and an arm, but otherwise we look the same

Iowa City, where Dave and Claire live, is a really cool college town. We went out to eat at One Twenty Six, a very nice restaurant at the downtown pedestrian mall. I had lamb chops with Brussel sprouts and they blended my meal perfectly. Betsy had steak and said it "melted in her mouth."

Dave and I were able to play 9 holes of golf before our flight home, so I got to try out my adaptive glove for one-armed golfers. It actually worked out pretty well, and I plan to join the PGA tour soon.

I’m joking. The glove was awesome but I remain a horrible golfer and an outstanding golf cart driver.

Look at that perfect form!!

The flight home from Iowa was pretty hectic. We had a connection in Charlotte, but our plane couldn’t immediately land because of storms. Then, the flight home got delayed and Betsy and I ended up getting bumped off the flight because it was overbooked (thanks, American). We did get free $500 vouchers for future flights so it wasn’t all bad but they were telling us we might not get a flight out of Charlotte until the next night. I only had two Real Food Blends left so the Vitamixer would have to sustain me.

That Real Food Blend in Charlotte really hit the spot!!! Have I mentioned how great it is to travel with RFB??

Fortunately, we were lucky enough to get standby seats on the last flight out of Charlotte. Instead of getting back to Knoxville at 7:00 PM, we arrived home at 11:30, but at least we made it home.

I know I've been horrible about blogging. I have gastroparesis (that will have to be a whole other blog post) and it's really taken a toll on my motivation for writing. I will try to be better about it in the future!